Nostalgia?

It was a coincidence as a friend shared my old photos from 2010 right when 10 year challenge is trending on facebook. Although I consider nostalgia to be a futile emotion and a relapse into the past as unhealthy, it got me thinking on where things went wrong. I might even be making the same mistakes now, as I did then, so the exercise was also meant to be a course correction.

I realised that I lost the plot after 10th standard board exams. I did not decide for myself what I wanted and was ripped apart by the decisions my parents took for me. I did not know what I wanted and went with what they lead me into. It has been over 14 years since those days and I have no regrets about whatever has happened since then. But I wish I had some measure of control over what went on during those days.

I did not read or write or develop myself personally at an age I should and instead, went into the rat race of entrance exams. I recount all this because I am in a similar situation right now. I need to take control of my life or else I will be lost and a decade later, I will be trying to find out what I did with my life. I don't want the critical junctures of my life to be blurs where my life was lead by forces totally out of control and I merely accepted it all passively.

I have not written anything for the past three years. This is an attempt to reclaim this life. Not sure whether I will be successful.