In a previous era, my days and my life were based on the seasons. Summer meant vacations and freedom where even the stifling heat could not tire my spirit and body. There was always energy for one more game and always time for one more innings. Rains meant a new school year, fresh books and drenched uniforms. Months and time of the day did not really matter for all that mattered were the seasons, and every season was always something to look forward to, something to be excited about and something to wait for.
In summer, I used to visit my grandparents place and there would be cousins to play with, elders telling us not to step into the sun and to be careful. But that has changed- one of my cousins is already married, grandparents are gone and we have built a new house in the same place where they had lived. But it is literally and figuratively impossible to recognise that I am at exactly the same place.
It is time that has changed and my life is no longer a matter of seasons, but of weekdays and weekends. The seasons are no longer significant- not just because they have become mixed up due to climate change- but life goes on no matter what. In the same place- which I used to wait anxiously to visit and where I used to play to my hearts content- in the same time of the year, there are no changes with the season. Do I wish those old days were back? That is where the period between my school days and working life taught me valuable lessons.
There was a period between the happy summer vacations and the normal summer days of now- university and civil service exam days. Summer, especially April brought the heat of Test2, lab exams and imminent compre. It was hectic and I wanted breathing space and time to relax- now I wish I was careful what I had wished for. What came next was an era that destroyed the seasons in the way usual people understand and brought Prelims, Post-Prelims, Mains, waiting anxiously, (disappointing) results and recovery seasons. When solely occupied (rather obsessed by exams), what happened everywhere else did not matter and I lost sense of time. The wait was killing, it was depressing and disappointing- time merely disappeared and it was just existence in the hope of something better some day- an endless wait. Three years went by as I stood still, waiting...
What has that taught me? To live in the present because I have control only over my present happiness and I can be happy no matter what the time, season or situation in life. To learn from the past and forget about the rest of it since it cannot come back but can guide me in my future. To build for the future so that I can be happy then too, no matter what the season or the event.
In summer, I used to visit my grandparents place and there would be cousins to play with, elders telling us not to step into the sun and to be careful. But that has changed- one of my cousins is already married, grandparents are gone and we have built a new house in the same place where they had lived. But it is literally and figuratively impossible to recognise that I am at exactly the same place.
It is time that has changed and my life is no longer a matter of seasons, but of weekdays and weekends. The seasons are no longer significant- not just because they have become mixed up due to climate change- but life goes on no matter what. In the same place- which I used to wait anxiously to visit and where I used to play to my hearts content- in the same time of the year, there are no changes with the season. Do I wish those old days were back? That is where the period between my school days and working life taught me valuable lessons.
There was a period between the happy summer vacations and the normal summer days of now- university and civil service exam days. Summer, especially April brought the heat of Test2, lab exams and imminent compre. It was hectic and I wanted breathing space and time to relax- now I wish I was careful what I had wished for. What came next was an era that destroyed the seasons in the way usual people understand and brought Prelims, Post-Prelims, Mains, waiting anxiously, (disappointing) results and recovery seasons. When solely occupied (rather obsessed by exams), what happened everywhere else did not matter and I lost sense of time. The wait was killing, it was depressing and disappointing- time merely disappeared and it was just existence in the hope of something better some day- an endless wait. Three years went by as I stood still, waiting...
What has that taught me? To live in the present because I have control only over my present happiness and I can be happy no matter what the time, season or situation in life. To learn from the past and forget about the rest of it since it cannot come back but can guide me in my future. To build for the future so that I can be happy then too, no matter what the season or the event.
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